Study Week

People!

Guess what I'm doing now? Hehehehhe... Online! It's called 'Study Week' for a reason right? But so far, I haven't studied yet. Okay, maybe a lil bit. I read through 'Tamadun India' @ Indian Civilisation slide show for 2 times. That was all.

I keep telling myself I've gotta start somewhere but as usual, I'm not listening! So I have to write it down; with hopes I'll start afterwards. Some of my friends are doing the same. Especially those who are at home (like me!). Oh man, I'm killing myself! How the HECK I'm going to earn the Dean's List for this sem?

I'm doing fine. Holding on tight. As you've read the previous entry, I wasn't doing okay. But not until now. For all pessimists (who are just like me) out there, if you're feeling down or 'low', praise yourself and you'll feel so much better. It might not be that magical but it'll help to boost your mood. Trust me. Say the phrase below out loud to yourself and believe in them! :

You are ______. You feel ________. Heck, everyone knows you're ________! So you are the new definition of ________+ness.

*insert the word beautiful/handsome/smart/awesome/cool/great/etc.

Keep your morale high! No one likes it when you're all emo and stuff. They like you better

when you're all happy and it's contagious! Try it out ya! :D ;D If it doesn't work, hit me back!

Replacable

When you've opened it wide,

When you've let it shone,

When you've begun to trust,

Don't even try coz it is already crushed.

When you thought you've figured it out,

When you saw the new stars,

When you heard the new songs,

You're dead wrong.

When the faith you've depended on,

The people you've loved with your heart strong,

And new roads that took you along,

You'll realise you have never belonged.

They'll make you think that you are one,

Your whole life won't no more be a run,

You've had all the tears, joy and fun,

And you believed there will always be sun.

You brave out and opened the table,

You hang to them like they're your long life cable,

It finally faked just like the fables,

They hit you hard and you're soften to friable.

And you found out you're not irreplaceable.

Easily replaceable.

Confusion All Cleared Up

Uuu-lala! Aha! Thanks to Iz Rijap, I finally checked out the statistic of my blog and found out that mine has been visited by people from all over the world (well, mostly). Anyway, it has given me motivation to start updating my blogs. Well, maybe just one of them. Anyway, I know people might assume that my blogs have died without any news but here I am. No worries. Just been busy with all sorts of trouble.
You know, coming back to the place where it all started doesn’t make it easy for me to start fresh. And my friend, too, was preoccupied with her own problems. We’ve got no one but each other. Remembering how we parted way the last time, I’d say we’re far better now. Our friendship has improved a lot and we managed to overcome some of our problems.
And now that I’m back on my feet again, I have new motivations and goals in life. Like a wise person once told me, “Be not just a dreamer; but an achiever too!” I’ll always hold on to that as long as I breathe. Talking about goals, I’ve been keeping a desire of mine a secret from my loved ones. Only 8 of them had found out about this but some discovered it accidentally. Ehem! :D
So, let me say this out loud! Remember a post of mine earlier this year? (Go and check for yourself!) I know I’ve told the world that I want to pursue my education in Australia right? Well, it was all just a dream until a senior told me about an education fair with the theme, ‘Study in Australia.’ Then it struck me, I just had to go.
I went and checked out some of the universities there. Most of them offered me the course that I really wanted; Language. Discussed about it with my parents and they seemed to approve. All the things left to do were to search for a scholarship and pass all the exams (IELTS and TOEFL). But, I remembered that I could be missing out a lot if I decide to go there. My friends here, the plans that I’ve made, the list that we’ve come out with. I was torn apart. I thought about it for almost a week and I had some trouble sleeping. I didn’t tell anyone about it coz I didn’t have the heart to. But, when the right time came, I went to see two counsellors at my faculty. Boy, they were very helpful! (Who knew?) Both of them told me to go for it! And they actually helped me to make up my mind.
Told my true friends here with some suspense (coz I wanted to see their reactions though I was disappointed). Don’t really know if they were relieved or felt nothing at all. I couldn’t really tell. I’ve decided to wait and shape myself until the opportunity comes knocking on my door with the funding and a guaranteed place in the University of Tasmania (UTAS). In the meantime, I’m going to build a resume no one could afford to reject!
Unintentionally, the news spread. And so here I want to apologise from the bottom of my heart for keeping it a secret. I didn’t mean to hurt anyone. I had my reasons. Here they are:-
1. I haven’t really decided whether to go or not (at that time).
2. If things don’t work out, and everyone knew about it, then the shame would be on me. I know people would ‘talk’ about it.
3. My best friends are far away. I couldn’t just drop the bomb through a text or even a phone call.
4. Didn’t want anyone to feel sad, burdened or affected by the undecided choice.
I truly am sorry. So, to clear all the confusions I’ll announce my decision here. Insyaallah, I’ll do my Masters in UTAS, Australia. But if the chance comes by anywhere near soon and I’m all ready as I was meant to be, I’ll have to reconsider. Whatever turns out in the future, I hope all of you would give your support. Finally, I hope this post will cease all the confusions. Thanks.

Truthfully,
TURISAINA